It’s…NOVEMBER?
Somehow I think part of my brain will forever be stuck in the 18+ months that were March, 2020…
Last night was Halloween and as usual I was home, alone, with no candy. It’s my favorite holiday not because I do anything with it but because I just love the dark, spooky vibe of the season. Alas, I also suffered some insomnia so I was up until after midnight. A message from the great beyond, maybe? LOL! I let myself sleep in this morning a bit, or at least as long as Keely would let me, which is about 7:30 am. It was still a cool 62°F out though, and Keely was feeling adventurous so we meandered off course a bit.
Caught this interesting…art installation? I don’t know but it is great:
The whole walk I was listening to the very first episode of Mel Robbin’s new podcast, which I highly recommend. Actually I recommend all the podcasts released so far; a couple of them have impacted me profoundly, especially regarding anxiety and emotional triggers. As the end of the year approacheth, I am thinking a lot about goals, gratitude, expectations, and the stories I tell myself about all of that.
One thing I have decided to change, a very small change but important for me, is to stop focusing on “financial stability” and focus instead on “financial prosperity.” I have been financially stable for years, and what I know is: poverty is “stable” too; and the price of “stability” is sometimes misery.
I have spent a lot of my life aiming low for fear of being seen and judged, and for fear of having something to lose. I’ve lost everything so many times, though, including myself. As a fat woman I’m judged just for existing. What am I protecting myself from again? Yeah: nothing that I don’t deal with every day.
No big proclamations here today, simply mulling on the many ways I’ve hamstrung myself and how 2022 has been about investing in believing in myself, no matter the risk. Not sure what the “theme” of 2023 is gonna be, but I’m ready to think seriously about it.