dawn at Lake Ella

3/1/2021 – Monday

It does feel surreal to be back in March again when for most of 2020 we all felt like we never left it to start with. The lockdown here in Tallahassee began on March 18 so we’re not quite at the one year mark, but we’re close.

My employer (FSU) is determined to let us all know that things will absolutely be back to pre-COVID conditions by August at the latest, in time for the start of Fall term. We’ve also been told that we are to start transitioning back to working in the office more than not by May.

And who knows, maybe everything will be back to that mythical state of normal.

What I think they are not counting on is that we, collectively, will never be back to normal. Too much death and sickness and hate and insurrection and lack of government oversight and cruelty and callousness…nothing will erase 2020 from the history of the USA. Nor should it.

I find myself back to being stressed and prone to anxiety in the meantime. I honestly do not want to “go back” in any way. I don’t hate my job and I do like my colleagues but I’m weary of this grind, whether from home or in a bland beige office building.

This morning I did not listen to music or books but just walked around with Keely, looking at the park and the dawn and the very few other people there with me. I suppose this is what coasting feels like. Like most of 2020.

For your pains in reading today’s installment, here is a photo of Keely hogging the bed yesterday afternoon.

Dogs really do expand to fill space, don’t they? 🙂