{172} freedom’s just another word for nothing left to lose

by | Dec 8, 2016 | Life and all That

It was 1999 when I decided to trash my credit score.

I did not have any particularly nefarious plans, honestly, but I owed a few thousand dollars to a couple of credit card companies and it felt insurmountable, given me and my husband’s low-wage jobs. The companies were always calling and always aggressively threatening my credit score, which terrified me. My credit score! Sacre bleu! 

Finally, one day, I realized that my chances of buying a home were negligent, I owned my car outright, and I did not need a loan for anything. I decided to stop caring about my credit score. It was not an easy decision, because I was very indoctrinated with the dogma that my future success in life was dependant on my credit rating.

But I was tired of being held hostage to that idea, and tired of financial institutions using the threat of lowering my credit score like a blunt instrument.

I negotiated with one card company to stop the late fees and lower the interest, and got it paid off. That hit my credit score for reasons I still don’t understand, and it took two years to pay off, but whatever. I cut the card up and paid.

The other one…well. Capital One are bastards. I tried to work with them and I kept sending payments but they kept piling on the late fees. It was an endless round robin of “I can’t pay that / okay if you can’t pay that please pay more” and I just quit. I told them to fuck off. It went to collections. I got threatened with being sued, but I ignored that because I was pretty sure they would not bother, given the low return. I was right. My credit score was trashed, but again, I had stopped caring long before then.

I have in the years since been given lots of advice on how to “fix” my credit rating. I never bothered. I still don’t bother. My student loans are in default and I don’t care — oh, I’ll pay something if they will take the money, I don’t particularly want to not pay money I owe. But threats against my credit score, or threats about tax return capture, or threats about wage garnishments…oh please. That’s not even in the realm of scary to me.

A credit rating is based on the idea that you plan to buy things with money you don’t have. That’s never worked out well for me, and I’d rather pay cash upfront anyway. There is nothing I cannot do if I have the money, while going into debt is a fantastic way to sell my soul to bankers who would be just as happy to ruin me as take my money.

Ref.: student loans.

Once you realize what a farce the whole “credit rating” game is, you are free. Sure, you cannot get a mortgage to buy a house, but were you going to? I wasn’t. I’m not planning on it now. Buying a house is a gamble anyway, it’s not the sure-thing investment it used to be.

I’ve lived without needing “good credit” for 17 years.

But we’re taught to live in fear of a hit to our credit rating. I remember my mother feverishly checking our score twice a year, like it was some kind of reflection on our worthiness as people, and freaking out if it had changed for the worse.

Every book on personal financial management spends oodles of time covering credit — what it is, how to get it, how to use it.

It’s a cultural given that people need good credit, that people must have good credit or suffer dire consequences.

Maybe it’s an off shoot from my time in poverty, but I ain’t skeered.

Yes, I’m cognizant of the fact that having good credit makes some things easier. It’s easier to rent nice apartments or go into debt for a car, sure. Some employers do a credit check on potential employees to reduce liability.

I’m not saying having a good credit score is a bad thing, or that caring about it pointless. I’m saying, “think about why it is important.” Is it, really? Or is it just that is what you were taught? Have you ever once thought outside of the “good credit is important!!!” box?

The truth is that bad credit doesn’t stop you from living your life. You can get married, find a job, rent an apartment, move, stay, have kids, buy a car…all without a “good” credit score. Sure, you cannot get a mortgage to buy a house, but were you going to? I wasn’t. I’m not planning on it now. Buying a house is a gamble anyway, it’s not the sure-thing investment it used to be.

I don’t live a life where easy has been or is currently expected, and I’m at an age where either I have the money to buy what I want or I don’t. The whole drama about student loans is laughable to me, because now with late fees the substantial amount I used to owe is insurmountable.

Short of winning the lottery or writing a best selling book, I’ll never pay that fucking debt off, never. I don’t have a home that can go into mortgage default leaving me homeless, I don’t have a car that can get repossessed out from under me, I don’t have investments that could possibly get seized. I don’t care about tax return capture — I pay just enough that the returns I get are small, if any, and I never plan on having that money anyway. I don’t care about wage garnishment because legally they can only take 15% of my disposable income, which is laughable.

Most of all, I don’t care about my credit rating, and that makes me stronger than any bank. When you got nuthin’, you truly are free.