It has been a week here in ye olde USA. I admit, by late yesterday afternoon I was feeling the strings of despair pull on my heart. Things are really bad and I don’t believe most people see how bad …they won’t, because they don’t want to, and will realize too late that what they wanted was destroyed by what they refused to accept.
So, yes, my thoughts have been dark. To ward off insomnia/fractured sleeping I have started taking melatonin before bed, and I am one of those people for whom it is very effective, it literally knocks me out hard. If I try to stay awake after taking it I feel like I’m drunk! It’s wild, but it works. (I might try a lower dose, though.)
So, by the time my early alarm (I have 3? 4? morning alarms) went off I was well rested, which is a nice feeling. Keely was very ready to go for a walk, despite the fact that she went for one later (okay, 9 pm) last night.
Things were the normal summer pre-dawn experience: damp, warm, and full of mosquitoes. There were a few car-homeless people set up in the parking lots, a number that is growing slowly.
The state of the world and the state of my emotions being what they are, I listened to music for most of the walk, and day dreamed. If you ever meet me, know that for 80% of our conversation, I am probably day dreaming about something wild and fantastic. Walking, talking, eating — I’m day dreaming. I do not daydream while reading, but then I sometimes put down what I am reading to follow a flight of fancy. I sit there staring off into space with a book in my hand, lost somewhere in a place and time that doesn’t exist.
I hear tell that not everyone is thusly afflicted. My imagination is fairly broad but that is something I cannot imagine at all.