I have a dog!
This is the culmination of about 22 years of longing and waiting. After my parents’ dogs died, I was not in a stable place (emotionally or financially) to take care of…well, anyone or anything. Then I got married and my ex did not want a dog for a pet (we had cats). Then…then…then…
The reasons kept going, always a valid and sensible cause as to why “now is not a good time” to own a dog. The thing is, I’m 48. There is never a better time, in the sense that if we want something badly enough we will create the “better time” we need in order to do it.
Not an absolute law, of course — life, fate, etc. does not work to our whims — but in the case of dog ownership, it’s pretty true. Lots of people have dogs while working full time, and living in an apartment, and not being rich.
And about a month ago, I finally woke up to that fact. It was a startling moment of clarity: if I really, truly want to own a dog, it is within my powers to make that happen. It would require some fundamental changes to my lifestyle and an outlay of expenses, as well as ongoing costs, but that is all very doable for me.
I remember sitting at my office desk at work and having this lightning-bolt strike of insight. Within minutes I was looking at Big Dog Rescue’s website, and within minutes of that I saw Keely’s “mug shot”:
And that was it. I was smitten, I wanted to meet her. This was back in early August. I mentioned it to none of my friends; while there exists there a wide range of opinions about dog ownership there (from “hell no” to “fuck yeah!”), the secrecy was more about the fact that this was a very personal decision to me.
I’ve never had my own dog. I was raised with dogs, but they were my parents’ in most ways. The dogs I grew up with were more like siblings, which sounds weird to anyone who wasn’t raised with dogs. But getting my own dog is a pretty monumental thing, in my mind. So when I decided that I was going to follow through on this, I kept the cards close to my vest.
Also, Keely was not healthy. She was recovering from being spayed and she had heartworms. She needed rest and recovery and constant treatment, which her foster mother (Lorriane!) was far better equipped to provide.
I did tell a few people along the way, but not many. Martha, who was my ride for going to get Keely; Heejin, who cheered me on; a few others who I thought might have good advice on adopting a dog.
Still, in the end, it was something I had to do on my own terms. Keely is an older dog, at least 8 years old, and so my time with her is limited already. But she’s been through hell and I think she deserves to spend the rest of her life in a loving and safe home. I wanted to set that up for her and also get my head around the fact that I would be her caretaker, the one she relies on for the basics (food, shelter) as well as love, affection, and color coordinated leash/collar sets. There would be no dumping food down and leaving Keely to her own devices like a cat. She needs exercise and coat brushing and a set schedule. It’s taken me a long, long time but I think this is something I’m ready to do.
Today, I brought Keely home. She’s a smart girl, and fairly easy going, but I can tell at this stage she is not sure what’s up. I hope she decides it’s worth sticking around. <3